Serendipity, Mental Health Tools, & The Destructive Power of Fitness
Article Round-Up: 12.11.22
Enjoy this week’s curated round-up of articles, podcasts, and more from the web.
Featured Thoughts: Letting the Path Unfold
As I’m coming to the final days of my time here in Lisbon, I’m leaving with tons of great memories and stories of my adventures. I’m shocked by the twists and turns I’ve taken, each leading me to the most memorable moments of my time here.
That has been the general theme for me of this trip—letting go of expectations and control and letting the path unfold in front of me.
When I first arrived on December 1st, I had very little idea of what my time here would consist of. To be honest, I had some anxiety and fears that my entire trip would be confined to my Airbnb or whatever gym I found in the city.
On day one, this is very much how things looked.
I checked in, found a gym within walking distance to get a membership at. Worked out. Walked around. Found a grocery store. Called it an early night.
Nothing exciting to say the least.
The following day I had booked, through Airbnb, a tour to a nearby town called Sintra. On this nine-hour journey I met some fantastic people. Many of them were nearing the end of their trip, while mine was just beginning. They gave me great tips and areas to explore.
A few even joined me for a food tour the following evening, where we met even more great people.
After the food tour concluded, a small group of us (including our tour guide Francisco) went out for drinks. At this after-party I got to know a new friend from the food tour, Mark, who is a digital nomad working and traveling the world indefinitely. Portugal marked his 13th country this year.
As I write this he will be comfortably settled on a beach in Bali somewhere.
I learned that Mark was also a fan of salsa and bachata dancing. What are the chances we’d share the same interest in dance?
He had researched all the bachata events in the city during his time here. As it turns out, there was a big dance social the following evening that he was planning to attend, and invited me to join.
The location of the dance social was at a studio that was adjacent to my gym. If that isn’t a sign from the universe, I don’t know what is.
I went to that dance social the following evening and danced my butt off for three hours before I had to head home for work.
As I was leaving, I pulled one of the instructors aside and asked if I could take a few private lessons before I left. My first lesson would take place four days later. It was so much fun, and the instructors—Simon and Florence—were a gem to dance with.
At the conclusion of my first lesson they shared even more dance events with me. Another social was happening the following evening in a neighboring town across the water. I’d have to ferry to get there.
At this point, I could have found a million (and one) reasons not to attend any or all of these events. But, part of letting the path unfold and giving up control is about being open to saying yes to opportunities as they are presented.
I took that ferry and went to that dance social and met a whole new community of people.
One exciting adventure leading to the next, each exposing me to new people and new opportunities.
It’s like a snowball rolling downhill: With a little push to get things rolling, it builds momentum and grows to something larger. It continues to roll until you decide to stop it.
My full circle moment came last night, as I attended a secret wine dinner hosted by a local named Andre. Andre hosts these dinner parties in his apartment, here in Lisbon, for travelers and locals alike. He shared his love of wine, crafted a wonderful meal of local cuisine, and we chatted around the table like family.
I met many other solo travelers who are beginning their journey here, just as my time comes to a close. I shared great tips and areas to explore, just as those did for me back in Sintra.
I’m all about maintaining control. I’ve been successful in my career in large part for my ability to think long-term and anticipate outcomes.
Lisboa (pronounced in Portuguese by locals as—lish-bow-a) has taught me that always approaching life this way, based on predictions and expectations, can quickly steal the magic of serendipity.
It’s important to predict and to plan, but save some room for magic too.
“Stutz” (Netflix Movie)
Takeaway: Pain, uncertainty, and constant work.
According to therapist Phil Stutz—subject of the new Netflix documentary, “Stutz”—these are three aspects of reality that can never be escaped.
Stutz uses these concepts as the foundation for helping his clients navigate their personal challenges in life.
If you haven’t seen this documentary yet, I highly recommend it.
“Fitness Is a Tool. Choose Wisely How You Wield It.”
Takeaway: Fitness is a tool that can help you discover who you are, or it can take from you those things that most support your humanity. Be careful which path you choose. In this article, I share the pivotal moment that my entire relationship with fitness changed.