On January 28th, I shaved my head.
I take pride in how I present myself, not just for vanity’s sake, but because when I look my best, I feel my best. And when I feel my best, I perform at my best.
So when it was time to make a change, I wanted to introduce this version of me on my terms. I booked a professional photoshoot, took videos, and made it a moment.
I shared the video on my social media to “introduce” my new look to the world.
Shortly after, I received a text from a friend. It said:
“So may I ask why such a big reveal?Why not just shave your and let people see it on their own?”
It’s a good question.
A major change in appearance is a big adjustment. Especially for me, as my appearance was an integral part of my identity. That identity had suddenly shifted.
The online reveal wasn’t for others, it was for me. It was a big deal to step into the new look and I wanted to do it in a way that felt empowered. I wanted to have a say in it.
It was a statement—to myself more than anyone else.
But it was also significant in another way.
When I moved to New Jersey, I was in a state of rebuilding my life. My “look” was really the last piece of my old life that carried over, and shedding that for something new was significant in its own way. This change represents a new era of Alex. I wanted to embrace that.
The result? It made the transition in my appearance easier.
Here’s how you can approach changes in your own life with that same sense of confidence and empowerment:
1. Change Feels Better When You Take Control
It’s easy to let big life changes feel like they’re happening TO you.
But when you actively shape how you experience that change, you regain power.
Whether it’s a physical transformation, a career shift, or stepping into a new phase of life, choosing how you introduce that change makes all the difference.
2. Your Identity Isn’t Fixed
We tie so much of our identity to external things—our appearance, our habits, our careers.
But growth means letting go of the past to make space for something new. For me, this wasn’t just about a haircut—it was about closing a chapter and stepping fully into the next one.
Reinventing yourself isn’t about losing who you were—it’s about evolving into who you’re meant to become.
3. Confidence is Built, Not Found
A lot of people think confidence is something you either have or don’t have.
But confidence isn’t magic—it’s something you create by intentionally stepping into the things that feel uncertain.
I didn’t just shave my head and hope I’d feel good about it. I made it an event. I controlled the rollout. I chose to frame the change in a way that made me feel powerful.
4. The Narrative is Yours to Write
A fresh start doesn’t just happen—you build it, one intentional step at a time. If you don’t take control of the narrative, someone else will write it for you.
And I don’t know about you, but I’d rather be the author of my own story.
Whatever change you’re facing—big or small—remember this: you don’t just have to accept it. You can own it. Step into it with intention and make it a reflection of who you are becoming. Because the next version of you? That’s entirely up to you.
P.S. Consider passing along this story to a friend going through their own big change.